All of it? None of it? Both intertwined, surely. Miles has never been more desperate to serve, nor more desperate to prove himself. He needs his grandfather's approval - or at least less of his noxious hatred. He keeps coming back for extra helpings despite everything.

"Merely echoing what I've heard every day of my life," he says. He won't belabor the point. It's not his intention to martyr himself, if only because he knows that won't help either. Other than by satisfying his urge to self-destruct. "I want to serve. I can still do that."