"Because of what Vorkosigan was demanding of me." He answers at once. His mouth twists bitterly; his hands go into his pockets, and he stares balefully at the ground. The way he glances around, the way he moves, he hardly even seems to notice her gaze. He doesn't flinch from it, doesn't shudder under its heat. Because...he can't let himself really see her. He can't let himself think about who it is he's lying to and manipulating.He just needs to lie and to manipulate, and not let the sick misery he feels overwhelm him. He can't...

"You heard that he brought me in to help him when he tortured that Komarran, right?" He glares down. "Because the Sanguinaire was good at torture, and all my ancestors back since House Vorrutyer was first created, so I clearly would be too. And there was just going to be more of it going forward. He wanted someone to put atrocity in the service of warfare. The pressure was coming more and more." His jaw clenches. "I needed to get away from it. From him. Before he put a knife in my hand and commanded me to flay or be flayed."