"Because...like I said. It was a spur-of-the-moment decision."

She's starting to believe me. Good. That's good. That's really good. That's...necessary. That's not something to feel guilty about. He'll come clean, completely clean, afterwards. And then -

And then what? And then she'll never trust me again. But trust - her trust, her love, all of it - that doesn't matter. What matters is getting her out of here alive and all right. Saving her life, saving her suffering. Next to that, her relationship with him is nothing.

"I knew if I'd tried to leave, Vorkosigan would have dragged me back and had me executed for desertion. The other outsiders might be free to choose, but I'm Vor. I'm good as conscripted. So there was a moment when there was no one - when I was far from the camp, when I had supplies, when no one would be looking for me. If I'd delayed..."

It's not quite an answer to her question. Because he's fairly certain she's asking why he didn't tell her about Piotr's treatment of him. And he's...thinking up a good response to that question even as his mouth chatters on automatically and buys him time.